Saturday, September 26, 2015

Time To Chuck The Bengay

Hubby and I just returned from a ten-day cruise.
Cruising seems to be what more 'mature' people do these days. I suspect it has something to do with not having to pack and unpack every time you hit a new place. That can be such a drag. Add into the mix someone comes in to straighten out your room three times a day, and makes and serves your meals.
Now you've really got something. Everything is done for you with a big smile, whether they mean it or not.

Being home the first day was a shock. What is this, I have to open my own refrigerator door and find something to cook for dinner? What do you mean I have to make my own bed? While I loved being home and cuddling with my cats, this was a big let-down.

I pondered all of this as I brushed my teeth, concentrating hard on my lust for the sybaritic lifestyle. After about twenty-seconds I noticed the toothpaste tasted funny. I picked up the tube and read the label: Bengay.
I panicked then rinsed and spit, expecting my entire mouth to tingle and burn from the ointment. It didn't. I read further on the label. Expiration date: 2011.  What had once been a soothing muscle ointment became a gelatinous nothing in only four years over it's due date.I looked at my face. Only several decades over my due date.
Time to take another cruise.


Joyce Mason said...

I love this, Heather. Not only does "saging" bring for me a desire to have more and more things done for me, but I've also grabbed the wrong tube before and attempted to brush with some very interesting "other stuff." You gave me a big chuckle of been there, gagged on that!

Heather Haven said...

Thanks for dropping by, Joyce! Hope to see you again at LCC! And hope you and your hubby are doing well!

dolorah said...

A cruise is on my bucket list. Maybe I'll spend my retirement on a cruise boat. I want someone to always think of everything; including the toothpaste :)